I wonder…

Sometimes I wonder whether there is someone controlling the fate of our world…whether there is someone manipulating the fate of each individual. Some people believe in the free will theory while others believe in luck and a vast number of the population believes in some form of God. I consider myself an atheist, but recently I’ve been questioning my belief. Here’s why.

***

During our free block everyday, many kids go outside to play basketball on the court. Surrounding the court, are a several picnic tables, where students each lunch when the weather permits. This particular study period lead me outside to the picnic tables, where some other students were studying. I admit I was only half doing my homework, half observing the game. Suddenly, one boy decided to throw the basketball at the net from the halfway point on the

court. Epically missing, the ball soared over the backboard of the hoop and I watched it sail through the air, falling straight for the picnic tables and the students who were focusing on their homework. I wanted to shout “heads up!” but I couldn’t find my voice. The ball came soaring down, merely missing the head of one girl by inches and bounced futily in the center of the table. I’m not exaggerating. The ball missed by inches. If the ball had been released one second earlier, if the wind had not carried it a few inches further, and if the girl’s head hadn’t been as close to the edge of the picnic table, then surely the ball would have hit and caused a serious injury.

***

I’m so genuinely appreciative for still being alive and fairly well. From that basketball situation I realized how assailable we are any time of day. Yet I still wonder, is someone controlling this fate? Is someone, is something altering our fates? If so, I wonder, when certain evasions of death like this occur, and someone else in another part of the planet is in an ambulance, is that person being forgotten? I guess all we can effectively do if appreciate the life we have. To its fullest extent. I once published a quote about cherishing life’s and its opportunities and I will reiterate it here:

“No one can confidently say that he will still be living tomorrow." ~Euripides

I understand I am the pilot of my life. I am the driver, the captain, the general of most of it at least and I have the discretion to make decisions everyday that will impact my future. Yet sometimes events that occur right before my eyes make me unsure whether someone/something is manipulating at least part of my fate. I do not think I’ll ever find out. But I know I’ll keep wondering.