Anxiety

Anxiety. It’s an interesting, vague feeling. It's not congeal. And it haunts me in my sleep, imminent in every decision made during those hours. In retrospect, anxiety is an interesting, nagging, and honest feeling. I don’t know how to describe it. It’s timid, only lingering around the corners of my mind, yet conspicuous enough to disturb everyday life. It throws me off track and unnoticeably, with Time, leaves.

Anxiety. One could describe it as worry. Sure, I don’t dispute that idea. But yes, I do observe something more. Something deeper about anxiety. Something raging inside. It wants to explode and it incessantly grapples inside my mind. It pushes and it pulls. It tosses and it turns over all the rocks you have strategically placed in life. I suppose anxiety can tip you over.

Anxiety. At the end of the day, everyone needs it. We would struggle to live up to our standards without its influence. By power of example, many of the greatest educators, writers, entrepreneurs, and diplomats live by this reality. It is a lifestyle, chosen by many, neglected by others. For me, I try to make anxiety a standard. It symbolizes care. It demonstrates ardor and it encourages integrity in everything I do.

Anxiety. I dare myself to live by this standard. Be comfortable, yet show interest and compassion on a daily basis. Be engaged. Worry. And until Time passes, anxiety will always bubble inside. But with Time, my anxiety will float away like the clouds. I will know my teachers. I will know my classes. I will know where I will attend college. I will develop a career. I trust Anxiety will keep me on my toes, and tell me that that time is imminent, only around the corner. I just have to wait.