My upper-year fall term has officially ended and returning home, I feel the imminent end-of-year holiday spirit. This is my favorite time of year. Even though the days are short and the nights long, I sense people’s spirit when I walk outdoors. When I go to stores downtown, I see the inklings of holiday decorations. Something I feel I write about almost every year around this time is the angle of the setting sun. It casts a warm, golden glow at an ideal 45-ish degree angle around 4 PM, perfect for taking photos or simply enjoying the atmosphere on a jog. This time of year feels like putty. The spirit of the holiday season almost molds itself into various holes in my life at the time being. I’m grateful for the upcoming season and spending much needed time at home with my family and a TV.
I’ve been reflecting upon this past term. One thing I find interesting about upper year is the “hype” around it. In previous years, when someone told me they were an Upper, it consternated me with respect and utter impressiveness that they were merely alive. As an underclassman, I legitimately thought upper-year would kill me from day one. Yet here I am…writing a blog post about the hype. Having survived my first term, I can safely say that upper year does not have to be as bad as what I anticipated as an underclassmen. I think a stigma always exists for people who aren’t living in the moment described, in part because we play a passive role when we hear stories of struggle. For me, hearing about upper year always sounded a lot worse than actually being in it. The long nights, all-nighters, and zero free time felt all too real and going into my upper year, I feared a similar experience.
I remember talking to Uppers in my dorm who liked to remind underclassmen that they were Uppers. While for some people the “hype” of Upper year really does exist and comes to fruition from day one, I think this experience varies by individual. I believe the continued legacy of the upper year hype arises from those who experience it most. It’s through individual experiences that stigmas around certain years come to be. For me at least, this fall term has gone better than my last fall term, where I couldn’t go to bed until at least midnight every night. Having been on this campus for two complete years already, I’ve also found places both on and off-campus to hang out. This has helped me destress and concentrate at critical moments.
Last week, I talked to some trusted seniors about their experiences, concerned that maybe I wasn’t pushing myself hard enough. They warned me that perhaps the hype hasn’t hit me yet, a fact that hadn’t escaped my thoughts. Yet one of my friends on the soccer team told me she felt her upper year was just like any other year of high school with a greater emphasis on performance. For her at least, the “hype” of Upper year didn’t hit either. Upper year, more than any other, is very formulaic and in a way, tedious. I think the strict schedule and routine helps me stay focused and prepared. I know when I’ll have free time, I know how much time I need to allot for a particular assignment, and I now know my personal limits.
This term, I’ve been striving to focus more on the process of learning rather than the outcome. I’ve found that this has helped me enjoy subjects I used to not enjoy in the past. I think I will continue to work with this mentality next term. In focusing on the process of learning and in the topics themselves, I’ve found a genuine purpose to my studying rather than just following the syllabus. This term, I feel as if the new schedule has worked in my favor and I’ve really enjoyed my newfound free time from work. Though I’m only ⅓ of the way through the year, it has gone by quickly thus far. I’m eager to take on what’s to come, likely in some blizzard storms. Cheers to winter term.
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