The thing I just don't forget

I've been moved time and time again by The Help.  I first encountered this book on Amazon Charts a few years ago. Though lengthy, every chapter drew me in and the emotional connection I developed with the main characters made sad scenes heart-wrenching. It's one of the few books I've read and cried to.

Several years and a new house later, I'd been arranging my bookshelf and "shelf of favorites" when I found The Help again. Time has taken away a precise recollection of the plot but it hasn't robbed me of all the emotions this book induced within me. Reallocating that book onto my shelf of favorites elicited a wow moment. I knew I was holding something dear to me, but I couldn't pinpoint what about the story had made it so spectacular. Even though I had read The Help way back in 7th grade, I did remember clearly how it made me feel.

I think that's what makes emotion so inspiring, potent, and soberizing. Emotion is one of those things I just don't forget. Even if I forgot what something was about, what someone said, or what someone did or gave me, I remember how it or he or she or they made me feel. And that feeling can bring back nostalgia, tears, or happiness sporadically. Sometimes it even feels unwarranted but what my heart is trying to tell me is that something touched me and it's time to reexamine that moment. 

I'm not one to talk about my emotions. In fact, I try to strip as much emotion down to its core as possible. That's something that changed in me from middle school to high school and I think it can be spotted with a keen eye in my blog posts over the years. I've grown less emotional, less prone to inspiration, more numerical, and I'm at the age in my life where I'm beginning to see the flaws in this world. It's no longer rainbows and unicorns, this country is messy. This world is messy. And that's something emotion disabled my middle school self to discern. 

Last night, I watched The Help on Netflix. Reconnecting with the plot brought back that wow moment. As scenes passed by, I remembered exactly how I felt at those moments and it was rewarding to relive those emotions through seeing it on screen. The second time, it hit harder. I'm uncertain if the reason I found myself crying throughout the movie was because of the emotional connections developed with the characters or because I apprehended how disconnected I've grown towards reliving past emotions over the years.