How seniors ask questions

There are two classes I take right now where there are seniors: music history and physics. I’ve noticed that the biggest difference between the seniors and the younger students, like myself, is their proficiency in asking the right questions and to self-advocate when they are confused. They merely have two years on me, but somehow in those two years, they’ve found ways to be more proactive in class. 

In my physics class, I am often confused. The course goes through topics very quickly and I often leave the classroom with lots of questions in my head. I’m sort of at that point in my self-advocacy where I will ask questions if the moment feels right. For me, I’m still hesitant to ask questions sometimes in class. It feels weird to ask questions when the teacher has already moved onto the next topic or if the teacher is getting really excited when they’re explaining the problem and then to hear me interrupt with « um, could you explain that again? I’m confused ». I feel as if it throws the teacher off track, and I feel bad asking too many questions. However, it feels different when the seniors ask questions. They ask lots of questions, at relevant times, and with profound efficiency. They do this without making it awkward for the teacher or the class. I’m not sure how they do it, but I think it’s the way they phrase the questions that make keeps the class flowing. What I’ve noticed and admire about the seniors is that they do not stop asking clarifying questions until the concept is clear. They know how to ask the right questions and point out exactly where they are confused. As a result, they get responses that are so tailored to that individual area of confusion that they end up only needed to ask one to two questions for that concept to become clear. 

This is an area I would like to improve upon. Being efficient with asking questions feels super critical to me because too often, I ask questions that get me responses I already understand. This can only mean I’m not asking the right questions. When I talked to the seniors in my class, they told me they felt similarly their lower year as well. Apparently asking the right questions and being proactively engaged in class is a skill that develops with time. For the time being, I will focus on asking more questions in class when I have them. 

The Perception of the gym

If you read my blog regularly, you’ve probably caught onto the fact that I’m a big believer in the power of daily exercise. Whether I spend an hour on the courts, running, or walking, I find that hour of some form of exercise is super beneficial to my sleep, study, and energy levels. While I can (finally!) see my legs when I walk out of the dorm in the morning (a.k.a I can finally wear shorts), it is snowy, wet, and cold for most of the year in New England. During those days, it is difficult to stay motivated and go out for a run or walk, and it’s definitely impossible to play tennis on an icy court. In those months of the year, I find myself going to the gym to use the ellipticals, mats, and some light weights to get in a good workout. I’ve always noticed that the number of girls and boys in the gym is pretty equal and there are the “regulars” in the gym who appear anywhere from 3-5 times a week. However, it recently came to my attention how intimidating the gym is for many people and the social stigma that surrounds the room itself.

When I look around the gym, most people who hang out in there regularly are varsity athletes or are passionate about fitness. Many athletes from the same team workout together in groups, which can be even more intimidating. I’ve haven't yet been intimidated by going into the gym, but it recently came to my attention that many of my close friends are. Last week, I was working out on the elliptical when I got a call from a friend. She asked me where I was. I replied I was working on the elliptical in the gym. She said cool, I’ll be there in 30 minutes. Can you stay with me while I stretch? I told her I would likely be done before 30 minutes but she insisted that I stay. I wondered why, and she told me that she was afraid to go into the gym alone without a “regular” because she never went herself. She also said she felt uncomfortable just going to the gym to stretch since she wasn’t going to break a sweat like all the people who squat hundreds of pounds or spin for an hour. In other words, she didn’t want to be judged. 

That’s precisely the social stigma surrounding the gym; it’s a persisting notion that all people who go to the gym lift 400 pounds, squat 200 lbs, run for 30 minutes, and are all super in shape. As a “regular” at the gym, I know this is untrue and I wish there was some way to change this perception on campus. I wish I could just tell people that the gym is a place for anyone with an intention and a purpose. Some people are in there to get stronger, others are trying to get faster, some of trying to change the way their body looks, and some are simply there to stretch.  While I can’t speak for others, I find that going to the gym with other people always decreases the anxiety that’s associated with it. As of now, I don’t know any immediate fixes, but I believe it’s important to make the gym a safe space on campus and not a place that represents some sort of social symbol. It’s not an easy fix, and other kids on campus may have talked about this issue before. I’m not exactly sure what I would do but I hope that someday, the gym can be a more welcoming place for everyone and not a room on campus that anyone has to think twice about before entering. 

Here's Passion

In everything we do, there are bound to be setbacks. I suppose passion is when you continue loving what you do even through those tough times and going into something with the willingness to fight. 

Tennis taught me that this week. At the beginning of the week, I was struggling with myself in the sport. I hadn’t been elected a co-captain and I was playing doubles instead of my preferred game, singles. At the time, during those rainy days where we didn’t have practice or those windy days where I struggled to hit the ball the way I wanted, I couldn’t focus on anything besides the fact that I wasn’t playing singles and that I hadn’t gotten the leadership position I strove for. Late at night, I would find myself watching quick match points on Youtube to accrue some inspiration and I questioned whether I wanted to stay on the team and whether I even wanted to play tennis anymore. At the time, it felt as if I couldn’t imagine myself being on the team if I didn’t play singles. 

Our game on Friday indubitably reversed these negative thoughts I’d been having at the beginning of the week. I played a singles exhibition match which I won 6-0 and a tight doubles match where my partner and I lost 7-9. But after I stepped off the court and got onto the bus back to campus, I couldn’t help but notice how…great I felt. It didn’t matter that I’d lost in doubles because my partner and I fought for every point. We came back after losing three games in a row.  We came back even though someone in the crowd was rooting for the other team. He was making funny (but distracting) comments such as: “LOVE that volley! Right over to the next area-code!” or “I love my poached eggs”. He was hilarious and his commentary set a unique dynamic on the court for my partner and me. Nevertheless, we came back after being down 6-3 and we had to play an extra game because it was so close. It was a match worth fighting for and I don’t regret it one minute. I look back at that match and I smile. 

When I look at with a clear head, I realize that I’ll never quit tennis. It’s like a part of me. It’s doesn’t matter how good I become or whether my skill declines later in life. I feel this sport is truly a part of me and I get inspired in a unique way every time I walked off a court satisfied.  I thought about some of the good points and how my partner and I overcame our distractions with the annoying fan. I keep thinking about how amazing a feeling it is being able to fight for something so intensely in the moment. Even though I played an exhibition match for singles, I played some technically advanced points and, of course, some not so bright points. It was that concoction of events that lead me to feel extremely happy even just to be able to play. I was talking to my friend about it on Friday night and she told me: “it means you’re really passionate about tennis since you’re able to find happiness in it after you’ve faced some obstacles”. I guess I am. But now I also know what the word passion means to me. It’s hard to put into words and I suppose it’s more a gut feeling than anything else. It’s a happiness that arises and a willingness to work through anything that comes in the way. And it’s something you wouldn’t ever abandon.