Sunday, September 9, 2018

Being a Lower


’m back on campus.  Back with my friends.  Back to being a student.  I’m still not completely set with my routine yet, as I’ve only had one day of classes and no homework due yet.  Though life on campus is still liquidy and anything but stable, one thing is different this year: I am no longer part of the youngest class on campus.  As insignificant as that may seem, for most people in my grade, this has proved to be quite a new experience and it’s something we have talked about consistently throughout this week. 

It’s a different feeling homing back to a place where I spend the greater part of the year.  When I was new, it was very intimidating.  I tried to fake who I was, and I still remember how fast my heart was beating on moving in day as much as I was trying to hide it.  As a returning lower (sophomore), I know everyone in my grade besides the new lowers whom I’m eager and finding opportunities to meet. 

However, something my friends and I have continuously been observing is the freshman class.  Most notably, I noticed how they stuck together in humongous groups of at least ten people and I even groups of 30 people go downtown together!  I wonder why there are such large groups, in fact, I’ve rarely seen freshman travel by themselves.  They’re always in groups, so curious I talked to some older kids in my dorm.  They said this is consistent across ALL new freshman classes.  The I’m new in a big school where I know nobody,  I need to travel with people, power in numbers mentality.  Is that what’s going through people’s minds?  I must have been like that last year, I just don’t remember it.  But it intrigues how now that I’m just one year older, I don’t have to stick in those large groups.  Is it growing up? Or is it acquired confidence?

Another great thing I’ve noticed about being a lower and having a year at school under my belt, is I know more people.  I’ve said “hi so-and-so” so many times so far, I think I’ve greeted more people in these past four days than I greeted my entire first month of school last year where I knew close to no one.  And it’s a nice feeling.  It truly is.  It feels like I have a presence, that I’m there, and that people remember me. Of course there are plenty of people who I don’t know, but it’s a different feeling than last year, when I didn’t know the names of even the people in my own grade.  I remember walking around, seeing a face, and thinking “oh shoot, what’s their name again?” Honestly though, they were probably thinking the same thing.  

Being a lower also comes with more freedom as I expected.  There’s no lights out, and though sign in is still the same, my house counselors are more forgiving about accidental lateness.  I want to note how last year, the student body co presidents were welcoming/re-welcoming kids to the new school year.  They described the roles of each of the grades and they said lower year as the year where “you’re just sorta there.”  Maybe they’re right in saying that.  But now that I’ve moved in and settled down, I think I can at least say I’m excited to just be here. 

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